There’s No “I” in Team!

Posted on October 23, 2012 by


This is a guest post from Lindsey Watson from Running in Circles.

Stephen and I celebrated our seven year wedding anniversary this past summer. So while I realize that we’ve got nothing on those cute old couples on When Harry Met Sally, I still feel like we’re past the rookie stage when it comes to being married.

Well, that just shows you what I get for thinking, because just a couple of weeks ago I finally had an epiphany that should have belonged back in Year One.

Stephen is a youth pastor, so the phrase “Daddy is working” can mean a lot of things in our house.  This particular weekend, Stephen had stayed up all Friday night hosting a lock-in, and so on Saturday he needed time alone to sleep and then some quiet hours to finish getting ready for Sunday School the next day.  This left me on my own to entertain Abby for the day, which is not asking that much.  Except that it WAS Saturday, a day that I’m accustomed to having Daddy on hand to share the toddler-entertainment duties so that I can work  more productively or get some personal time.

We finally made it to that blessed hour in the afternoon when Abby camps out in front of some episodes of Busytown Mysteries and I go to the kitchen to get started on dinner.  Stephen was in the living room typing away on the next morning’s lesson.  I stood at the sink, washing up some dishes and breathing those heavy, loud sighs–you know the kind–that mean, “You are WELCOME for all the hard work I do!”

In my imagination, those sighs would prompt Stephen to come into the kitchen and rub my weary shoulders.  “What a long day you’ve had,” he’d sympathize. “How are you feeling?”  And I really thought hard about how to describe why I was so irritable.  Finally I could summarize it: “I want this weekend to be over so we can get back on a normal schedule and be on the same team again.”

In real life, Stephen could not hear my breathing from the kitchen, so I was left with my own thoughts, and even they offered me no sympathy.  “So you’re only on the same team when Stephen is helping you?  Your ‘working overtime’ today is enabling him to do the church work that he needs to do.”

Oh, fine.  Don’t you just hate it when your own brain kicks the legs out from under you?  We were in fact, not on the same team at at moment, but  only because I’d suited up for Team “It’s All About Me.”

The good news about this realization is that I was in a position to grant my own wish, with no mind-reading from Stephen required.  So (at least for that moment), I switched back to Team “We’re in This Together,” where, of course–everybody wins.