God Is Sovereign Over Our Husbands’ Generosity

Posted on December 7, 2012 by


This message from a wife REALLY touched me.  I know it will be such an encouragement to many of you.  I want those of you who are not yet married to see the way God works when a wife obeys Him and walks by faith and puts Christ first in her life.  MANY women tend to want to give more to charity and to the poor than their husbands do.  I think part of that is because men are wired to think about providing for their families – and that is a GOOD thing.  But it is easy for wives to want to give more and to look down on their husbands for being “stingy” or not being “generous enough” and this can quickly become a source of contention.  THANK YOU to this precious wife for her willingness to share!

Hi Peacefulwife,

I have been reading your blog for about 4 months now and I am encouraged by it daily. I go to your blog often times looking for a devotional because you address the root causes of disrespect towards our husbands, and when we fix the root cause we see fruit in other areas of our lives, not just in our marriage. So… thank you… Jesus is using you to bless many of us.

I wanted to share with you a testimony about money/giving. I tend to be much more giving with our money than my husband. In the years past, if an opportunity came to give then I would usually want to give double (or more!) much as my husband. I would usually make him feel guilty or less spiritual than me because he wasn’t as quick to give. Looking back on it now (I didn’t think this way before), I can see he was actually being wise by putting some thought into what to give instead of blinding giving. But at the time I made him feel bad for it. Thanks to the Holy Spirit and teachings from you and other resources related to respecting my husband, I am happy to say in the last 6 months I have become a new creation. I hate my sinful nature and love my new life!

So here was my latest challenge as being a respectful wife:
A tradition we started last year for Christmas was that instead of exchange gifts, we make a donation to a charity in each other’s name. We have been very blessed financially this year so I’ve had it on my heart to give more than we did last year. But I knew my husband wouldn’t be keen on the idea. Last year I really had to stretch him to give as much as we did, so to ask for him to give more this year did not seem like it would go over well. Now just because I didn’t think my husband wouldn’t agree with how much I wanted to give doesn’t mean I just gave up on the idea. I really, really wanted to give! God’s given us sooo much and I want to share it with others. But I also didn’t want to make my husband somehow feel bad for not wanting to give. So I left it up to our Father.

I prayed something like this, “Father, I want to give and I know that it’s in line with your Word that we should give to those who are in need, so I ask that if you do want us to give extra then put it on my husband’s heart.” Had God not put it on my husband’s heart, I would have happily trusted my husband’s decision on how much to give even if it was a “small” amount.

But!….Last Sunday our church announced an opportunity to give. Before I could even process what the Pastor had said about it, my husband looked over to me with tears in his eyes and said “we have so much and they have nothing.” He then declared “we are going to offer to match any donations that come in up to (fill in the blank) dollars”. The amount he wanted to give was 225% more than what we gave last year!!! This time his giving heart was challenging me!