Am I Giving “Relationship Advice” to Non-Christians?


My purpose is to teach biblical principles about living for Jesus Christ and preparing for a godly, Christ-centered marriage for women who have given their lives to Jesus as both Savior and Lord and who are walking in the power and wisdom of God’s Spirit. The only wisdom I have comes from Scripture. God’s wisdom is “foolishness” to the world. It goes completely against what is politically correct, what is intuitive to us and what comes naturally to us as sinful people. He calls us to forgive those who hurt us, to be kind to those who mistreat us, to pursue Him above worldly things. His design for marriage seems backwards to our human minds. But His wisdom works because He created us and knows what we need and He knows what is right.

EVERYONE is welcome to read here – regardless of your faith or background! If you are lost, confused, frustrated, discouraged, overwhelmed and looking for hope, I believe  you will find it here in Jesus Christ. I pray you might be blessed by what you read. I deeply desire EVERYONE to come to Christ! The principles of God are always a blessing to our lives, but the greatest promises of God are for believers in Christ:

ROMANS 8 applies to those who love God. I want EVERYONE to experience the blessings and benefits of the promises of God in the Bible!
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:28-39

The promises of God’s Word are for those who are willing to obey Jesus in everything. He asks for our total surrender. He gave up His life completely for us, now, we give up our lives completely for Him:

Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. 24For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will save it. 25What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit their very self? 26Whoever is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.” Luke 9:24-26

I am writing to those women who love Jesus wholeheartedly (or who want to learn to do this) and have been called according to His purpose. I am also writing for those who are discouraged, depressed, lonely, frustrated, overwhelmed and feeling hopeless – that they might find the great hope available in Jesus!

Some of the principles from God’s Word may be of  benefit to unbelievers – like a woman showing respect to her man. Men are generally hardwired to desire and respond to respect more than to respond to disrespect, just like women are generally hardwired to desire and respond to love. But the reason biblical submission “works” in marriage is that we are first completely submitted to Christ as Lord. Then we can receive His promise to use all things for our good and for His glory.

Will the biblical concept of submission “work” for an unbelieving wife or girlfriend?

God’s principles work. They are universal.  So there may be some benefit for unbelievers as they seek to apply God’s design to their lives. And sin hurts people. So sinning (doing hurtful things) less is good for any relationship. But if our faith is not in Jesus, the promises of God in Scripture would not apply. When a believer obeys God and walks by faith in Jesus Christ, that person can trust God’s sovereignty and cling to God’s promises all throughout the Bible. For many women, the definition of “these concepts work” means they want to be able to control their men and get them to do what they want them to do. That is not what this journey is about at all.

  • However, I do know of a woman who decided to try submitting to her husband and eventually, through that decision, she came to know Christ! WOOHOOO!!!! How amazing is that!?!?! Ultimately, that is the greatest goal. For us to all come to know Christ. So I don’t at all want to discourage women from obeying God’s Word, even if they don’t know Him yet. Perhaps a woman’s obedience to God will lead her to Christ?


Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. Hebrews 11:6

Please catch that. God rewards those who earnestly seek Him.

If someone is just trying to get “relationship advice” or “marriage advice” and they are not trying to earnestly seek Jesus, there are no rewards from God for that person. There are no promises of God to claim.
It is my prayer that each person who reads my blog may come to know Christ Jesus. But,

If you try to apply what I talk about apart from living fully for Christ, I think you may be very frustrated. You may be missing the entire point and missing a relationship with God and missing the only power source there is to live a godly life. However, perhaps God may use these things to draw you to Himself?

If a woman does not know Christ Jesus as her Savior and Lord, that is her greatest need! This one decision determines each person’s eternal destiny. Then, once she comes to know Him and yields her life to Him, she can begin to apply biblical principles in every aspect of her life through the power of her faith in Jesus and God’s Spirit living in and working through her. It is IMPOSSIBLE to be a godly woman in our own human strength.

“I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. No one comes to the Father but through Me.” John 14:6
After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed:
“Father, the hour has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. 2 For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. 3 Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. 4 I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do. 5 And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began.” John 17:1-5
If you have never received the gift Jesus gave to you – how He died in your place for the wrong things you have done, and how God raised Him back to life so that those who trust in Him might also be raised to life forever with Him in heaven, I invite you to check out the post “How to Have a Relationship with Christ” at the top of my home page. You may also want to check out or and search “salvation.” And you may want to read the gospel of John. You can find it at 🙂 You will NEVER regret giving your life to Jesus and claiming Him as your Master and Lord. If you want to talk about this, please let me know!

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